Soft
by SmileMandalore
Summary: Spoilers Alert: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK, it has spoilers connecting to both my main stories and to KotOR II. So if you'd rather wait for my to finish publishing those stories do so, but if not, feel free to read it. The Exile returns to confront Atton.


Soft

"You told me you were never going to come back."

"I lied."

"I know."

And that lie had been so bad that she couldn't even look him in the eyes. He sat on the front porch looking at her, the one he had once loved with his whole heart. She was now foreign, a stranger, standing in the tall yellow grass; wielding two red light sabres which had once been Viridian and Cyan. Her once long black hair was tied in a pony tail, something she had never done when she was in his presence, and her eyes; that was the worst part; he couldn't see her eyes.

Not moving from where he was sitting, Atton took a cup off the armrest and took a short drink before speaking again; this time in a less solemn voice than he had spoken in before.

"I loved you."

It was her turn for the solemn reply, "I know."

Her hands gripped the handle of her light sabres in an attempt to hold back; to not strike until absolutely necessary. She had not been looking forward to this day, but she knew it was inevitable. She had never found Revan in the outer regions and when she gave up looking, backing in on a promise to a broken man, she went into a state of depression. This wave of depression was eventually taken over by anger towards Atton. She blamed him for everything; the Sith, Kreia, and ultimately Pepper's death. She blamed him because if he had fallen in love with Pepper she would still be around, Shana Opofella would not.

"Why?" Shana finally said, taking a deep breath before continuing, "Why did you choose me over her?"

Atton rested his arm next to the cup beside him, careful not to knock it off. "I was an outcast on that ship…"

"That doesn't ans…"

"Ssh," Atton hushed her by putting a finger to his lips, "Jakkie's sleeping; there's no need to wake her up."

Shana's face finally rose and she looked to an only window in the second floor of the house. The curtains were drawn closed. Atton took note of her eyes while she was looking up; they were still the bright green colour they had been when they first met on Peragus. She was still the Shana he knew and loved.

"You were the only one who even acknowledged me; the only one who even gave me the slightest respect. But above all that, you saw me for who I really was." Atton finished, taking another drink afterwards.

Shana's face lowered to the ground again. Quietly she said, "But that's not all."

"No, you're correct," Atton continued, dropping the empty cup to the floor and emerging from his seat on the porch. Taking careful and slow steps towards her he said, "You were beautiful, you are beautiful. You will always be beautiful. Shana, I loved you because you are a good person. You still are a good person." He took careful steps towards her and her red light sabres in the middle of the field. "Show me the person I feel in love with."

She deactivated her light sabres but did not move. Her whole body started to tremble and Atton, as he got closer, could see tears falling from her eyes.

"I'm not that person anymore," she said, still shaking and crying, "The Shana you knew left when she ventured to the outer rim. I died inside that day; I know you know that."

Atton nodded, still walking towards her. "I know. But I still love you none-the-less."

He now stood right in front of her small, quivering body. He put his hands to the sides of her face and brushed the loose strands of hair back behind her ear. Her hair was just as he remembered; soft. He lifted her face up to meet his and saw her eyes, once so happy and full of love, now full of sadness and a hint of anger.

He also noticed a long scar running from her nose down her left cheek. He took his right hand back and traced it with his index finger. The slight touch irritated her skin and made her shake more than before.

Still gazing into her eyes and holding her face in his hands again, Atton spoke in a softer tune than he had when she first arrived. "I will always love you," he said quietly, watching as her eyes darted from his when he said love.

Tears continued to stream down her face as she looked back at him. Something inside of her clicked when he said those words, and she found herself, too, speaking them to him. "I will always love you too."

That was all he needed to hear. Atton pulled her towards him and met her lips with his. Pulling back to see her face again he noticed that she had her eyes closed, her lips still poised after meeting with his. He chuckled to himself quietly and she quickly opened her eyes, colour running to her cheeks.

"I knew you were still the same," Atton said, meeting her lips again.

She was the one to pull away this time. She looked away from him at the long flowing grass in shame. "I've done some terrible things Atton," she said.

Atton wrapped his arms around her waist and held her against him. She rested her head on his broad chest, her hands holding on to his jacket like she never wanted to let go. Atton rested his chin on her head.

They stood in the middle of that field in silence as the sun continued its descent behind the hills. This would be the last time they would see each other. They both knew this; they could feel it in the force.

Atton heard Jakkie calling to him and pulled himself back from Shana to get one last look before they parted ways.

"I love you," he said and he gave her another long kiss. "I'll miss you, remember that."

Shana nodded and looked to Jakkie's bedroom window. Atton noticed her gaze and followed it. When he saw where it was leading he turned back to her and smiled. "She loves you too."

Shan gave a sad smile, "I love all three of you. Take good care of her for me." She stood on her tippy toes and kissed Atton on the cheek before running off into the purple horizon.

Atton watched her until she was out of sight. He then sighed and turned to see Jakkie looking out her window crying for him. "I will," he said as he took one last look at the horizon and then headed inside.

Shana looked back at the almost invisible structure that was once her home. She took a good long look at it, remembering the contours of the place, and then ran off towards her ship.

She still had time to keep that promise to the admiral; she never backed down on a promise, even if she was soft.

**End.**


End file.
